Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
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