Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
