I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
