And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Randomize
