It's Friday. Sex?
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
