spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
