If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
