I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
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