eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize
