They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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