You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
