It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
