How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
