thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
