one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
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