everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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