Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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