everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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