Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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