It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
