im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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