So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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