Your mouth is God's brothel.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
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