what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
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