she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
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