i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
