I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Randomize
