He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Alive.
So much puke
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
