Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Randomize
