remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
