In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
