Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Randomize
