bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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