I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
