yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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