i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Randomize
