No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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