I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
