there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
