i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
