Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
