how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
