i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
