Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
