Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
