There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
His nipple licking is glorious
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