Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
