my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
It's just like the Real World with babies
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Randomize
