are you still at the devil's house?
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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