it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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